sleeping_with_one_eye_openYou’ve heard of high levels of competence described as, “he’s so good he can do it with his eyes closed.” What if it has to do with sleep? What if it has to do with being righteous?

In having a look with my coach at my difficulties sleeping through the night, she suggested I consider my relationship with Billy; you might say my integrity with myself. As much as I may have dropped the tug-of-war rope with Paula, I was still battling with myself. It became clear, like many things in life, I had a picture of how it should look for me to sleep the right way. I had it that there was a problem or something wrong with anything other than at least eight hours of solid, uninterrupted sleep. There was definitely a way that Billy should be sleeping and the way Billy has been sleeping is wrong. If I woke up at 4 AM, before I could get one eye open, with my one iota of consciousness, I could generate enough righteousness to keep myself from simply relaxing and going back to sleep.

I realized it was time to fire “the sleep police.” I found this all very perversely amusing.  What do you say about a guy who is starting to have trouble recalling the names of acquaintances, who is not awake enough to do arithmetic, but can still pass judgment? Perhaps, “he’s so righteous, he can do it with his eyes closed.” I’m a harsher version of the Stephen Wright line: “When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me ‘Did you sleep good?’ I said ‘No, I made a few mistakes.’”

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